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THIS POWERFUL MEMOIR PLACED HIGH IN THREE DIFFERENT CATEGORIES
ON THE AMAZON.COM BESTSELLERS' LIST: 5TH IN EMOTIONS, 7TH IN WOMEN STUDIES, AND 7TH IN GENDER STUDIES! PURCHASE YOUR COPY TODAY! ALSO AVAILABLE ON AUDIO FOR THOSE WHO
ARE ALWAYS ON THE GO!
| Vickie In The Studio |
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| Recording The Book On Audio |
A "TELL-ALL" BOOK THAT IS SURE TO BOOST YOUR SELF- ESTEEM!
Written and Illustrated by: Vickie L. Evans Ladies—it will empower you!
Men--it could help you to understand
the women in your life more effectively!
Know Your Worth!
(Overcoming The Dragon of Low Self-Esteem!) is my personal memoir of my battle with low self-esteem (some of you could
write your own book on this subject). Being a two-time divorcee prompted me to take inventory of my life, journeying
back to my childhood, to find the root cause of my esteem issues, which affected my adult choices and decision-making process.
Many may tend to believe that individuals with low self-esteem are non-functional and unsuccessful-walking around with their
heads down-shiftless and non-productive. That is a false perception; some are entrepreneurs, politicians, CEOs, television/radio
personalities, or even authors!
I discovered several factors that chiseled away at my confidence level:
1) Approval Addiction – Seeking to fulfill my mother's and others' dreams, when I had dreams of my own, which I suppressed.
Through this, I lost my identity and became an conformist! The real me was buried in a pile of "other folks standards"
and preferences. I wore many masks because I did not know who I was. In the introduction of the book, I mentioned
wearing the mask of religion and I made this statement: "Yes, I could really hide behind that
mask because I did not have to pretend alone; there were others who were pretending with me within the congregation.
All we had to do was sing a few hymns, and quote a few Bible verses then no one would ever know that we were scared puppies
- afraid to face our fears and insecurities."
In addition, I was raised in the generation
that said, "Do as I say, not as I do!" Yet, there were no role models to show us
what we should "do", and there were no guidebooks to show us how we should "act". James Brown said
it best-- they were "talking loud, and saying nothing!" In the chapter"The
Evolution of Me", I discuss how I got my identity back (Vickie's got her groove back, y'all!). I
have found the real me; I am liberated, educated, sophisticated, and dedicated to being the best "Vickie"
that God made me to be!"
2)
The
“Stuck In A Rut” Syndrome – I lived in a community with widespread
infidelity and domestic violence. Domestic violence was like a spectator sport! Most weekends, at least one couple
would have a public fight, while both adults and children stood by and observed. During one incident, I saw a man place
a lit match up his wife's nose. Days later, they walked arm-in-arm as if the incident never happened.
And
the infidelity...there are quite a few children who strongly resemble someone else's husband! Some of the
women lived their whole lives in this vicious cycle and passed down this demoralizing behavior to their children, their grandchildren,
and so on. Though I was physically and geographically liberated; I had to free my mind, as well. The baggage
of my upbringing followed me into my adulthood. This book and my assessment allowed me to "leave the baggage
behind". In the chapter, I Only Eat Filet Mignon (Simply the Best), I mentioned the Chevrolet commercial
with singer, Mary J. Blige, where she is picking up and driving around "Marys" from each stage of her life, as portrayed
on her album/CD covers, to include: 1) the "Real Love" Mary, 2) the "My Life" Mary, and 3) the "No
More Drama" Mary. During the commercial you see her taking the "baggage" out the car and leaving it on
the curb. Then the announcer says "The space to take everything with you; the wisdom to leave the baggage
behind." Ladies and gentlemen, I have achieved that--I now have the wisdom to "leave the
baggage behind". This principle has helped me "overcome" the dragon of low self-esteem.
3)
Low Self Image – In the chapter Optimism
versus Pessimism, I make this statement, "How you see your life, is how you live your life and vice-versa;
how you live your life, is how you see your life!" When I was a child, I used to stare up in
the mirror and tell myself that "I was so ugly!" and I was convinced that no one would ever want me.
That is why when I committed to a relationship; I stayed, even though the relationship was not good for me or began to
deteriorate and chisel away at my self-esteem even more. I stayed with my high school sweetheart for that very reason
(In the chapter, "I Am the Other Woman", I discuss how I gave my high school sweetheart my virginity as
a Christmas present (I am really candid in this book!). The only thing that drove us apart was my parents' separation
and my mother's decision to move to Tacoma, Washington, prior to my senior year in high school. This turned out to be
a blessing in disguise, because my high school sweetheart (in his adult life) became a drug dealer and served two prison sentences.
Without a doubt, I believe that if I had stayed in my hometown, I would have been married to a drug dealer, instead of being
free to write this book! I believe the contributing factor to this behavior was my low self-image and my false-thinking
of my physical unattractiveness. I say false-thinking because when I look at myself now, I realize that I am beautiful
(Read the chapter entitled, Self Gratification - Loving the Skin You're In!). As a matter of fact, many have
commented that at 50, I look the same way I looked when I was younger, (my Uncle Charles made this statement a few weeks ago)
and I really do!
So, what changed? My thinking changed! My opinion of "me" changed!
My "measuring stick" changed! My affirmation/declaration changed! Instead of looking in the mirror and
telling myself that I am "ugly"; I now look in the mirror and affirm my "beauty"! Here is
my declaration, "When I look in
the mirror, I see a beautiful person with distinct characteristics--no one else has my DNA! My fingerprints are distinct,
my teeth are unique, even the hairs on my head are numbered. No one else can duplicate me! The scriptures declare
that God made me in His Image. I don't say this boastfully---But Thankfully! As a Child of God, GREATNESS LIVES
IN ME! I am the "head", not "de-feat!"
These are just a few
factors that contributed to my battle with low self-esteem; there are more accounts and discoveries in my book! Some
of you may not discover or recognize that you are suffering from this condition, until you start reading the book. It
may make you do your own personal assessment or conduct your own inventory. At any rate, you will be inspired!
Ladies, you have to make this book a part of your reading repertoire-it will empower you! Men, this book could
help you understand and deal with the women in your life more effectively! Help me make this book a best-seller and
share it with someone else. You could be instrumental in freeing someone who is also plagued by this dragon!
Available on Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com
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NOW ON AMAZON.COM AND BARNESANDNOBLE.COM! |
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A Classic That Will Last A Lifetime!
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NOW AVAILABLE ON AUDIO
- PERSONALLY READ BY THE AUTHOR!
AMAZON.COM BESTSELLING MEMOIR!
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